Tweedy Bird

I've been wearing my H&M Tweed jacket a lot lately. I got this jacket some time ago (around spring 2014) but for some reason only started wearing recently. I love the texture of it, although it catches on everything. When it catches, I'll just cut the strings out and it's no worse for the wear. I've been wearing my Stella McCartney bag with it for a super-tweedy combo.

Today, by the way, is the first day of spring, and we are waiting for another snow storm to begin in the New York region... Will this ever end?

All the Light We Cannot See

Ok, time to catch you guys up on my reading again. Gosh, it's been so long I don't even remember all the books I've read in between, but let's start with a good one. All the Light We Cannot See, by Anthony Doerr. It's been on the best seller list for a long time, and for a good reason. It is a beautifully written, almost poetic book that goes very deep in its characters. The story has many layers but carries one particular story as a red string through-out the book. I'm usually not too crazy about reading war-time stories, but this one was different because of the choice of the main characters, a blind French girl and a genius German orphan boy. It's not an easy book to read, and especially in the end, it's quite sad, and that is why I usually avoid the war stories. But this book is definitely worth the trouble and heartbreak. I had first borrowed this from the library, but it's a hefty book and I ended up loading this on my iPad so it was easier to carry on the commute. Amazon gives this book 4 and 1/2 stars, and I would agree. 

Black and White

Ive been wearing dark colors all winter, but now that the spring is finally showing some promise I'm craving lighter colors. This was my outfit to a birthday party on Saturday.

The sweater is from Anthropologie, shirt from H&M, leather skinnies from BR

I was also wearing my favorite jewelry:
The Elsa Peretti Bottle necklace, which my 4-year old loves to pretend to drink from,
Michael Kors watch, and BR ball ring

Having it all

Those of you who know me, know that at some point in my life I was extremely ambitious. But then something happened that changed me and my outlook on life for good. That something was 9/11 and the destruction of the World Trade Center twin towers. I was very close to the disaster, and it really made me think about what is most important in life. I kept thinking, if I die tomorrow, what do I want to be remembered for? For having a great career - or having a wonderful family and good relationships with the people I love? I obviously chose the latter, but being who I am, I was not ready to completely let go of having a career either. So I've hung in there, through having three children in a society that does not even give you a maternity leave, let alone any support for day care, and in an environment (the financial industry) where it's normal to work 12-hour days. I have tried to make it work for me, and I've been very very lucky to have understanding bosses that have given me a flexible schedule and the ability to work remotely at times, and work a shorter week. And still it is a challenge at times, and I've been stressed out and tired... I don't think that I would still be in my career if it hadn't been for that flexibility. That is why I get slightly annoyed with the Cheryl Sandberg "Lean In" mantra. Most working women are too busy and overwhelmed to "lean in", and make the conscious choice of not doing it because the cost is too high. I know that I have. 

I've been thinking about producing an event for women in the financial industry, and in the research process I stumbled on this article from a few years ago. I remember hearing about it at the time, and it caused quite a stir and discussion, but for some reason I never read it until now. And oh boy did this hit it right in between the eyes. Every word I feel is true and considered. It's a long article, but well worth the time it takes to read it. 

The Atlantic: Why Women Still Can't Have It All by Ann-Marie Slaughter

I hope there would be more discussion in the mainstream media that is honest like this. Our society and American businesses need to have better options for combining family and work in order to not completely lose the battle of having women in the workplace and having women advance to leadership positions. I'd be happy to hear if you have any thoughts about the article or this issue of working women having it all. 

So Ready for Spring

This was the coldest winter in New York for a hundred years. During the time that I've been in New York, more than 20 years, we've never had the snow stay on the ground this long. I am so ready for spring. This was my outfit on Friday: BR jeans, H&M sweatshirt, Zara shirt, Zara scarf, Stella McCartney bag. In real life you still needed a jacket though...

Not So Fast

I guess I won't be going to the South Beach any time soon...

I have to confess, the second of week of my South Beach diet was a total failure. In the beginning of the week I had sugar cravings that I was not able to resist. Mind you, I have read that sugar has similar addictive tendencies to cocaine (they are like in their biology), and once I gave into that craving I was gone like an addict and a sugar binge followed (it started with dried dates the first night, then a bag of Panda licorice next day and a half bar of Fazer chocolate at night, granola bar the third night). Once I emerged from the binge I got depressed, and you know how it goes.

After wallowing a couple of days in failure, self pity and disgust, I decided to just try to eat healthy, and stay away from most added sugars, i.e. I can still have fruit where the sugar is natural, and an occasional small treat if the situation calls for one. I will try to eat less carbs, but they won't be banned completely. If I allow myself to eat everything, maybe it won't become such a "forbidden fruit".

One thing that I will continue from South Beach is to try to keep to a schedule. I feel, especially as I get older, that it is more and more important to keep the blood sugar steady. Hopefully that way I won't set myself up for a binge, and can even train myself slowly to eat less sugar. I am not the most patient person in the world, so taking the long route is not ideal for me, but since the short cut definitely did not work, I'm willing to try this. I guess this is really how you're supposed to do it. Not a diet, but a lasting change.

I'm hoping that this is something that I can follow forever. It won't be easy though, because one thing that I noticed during my South Beach week is how sugar is EVERYWHERE, and I'm not just talking about the added sugar in everyday foods like breakfast cereal and tomato soup. I'm talking about how we are constantly bombarded with sweets. Whether it's the kids begging you to take them to the cupcake ATM, the cookies in the workplace lunchroom, or the cupcakes at your kid's basketball finals, the war is on. I will try to make it easier for myself by following this rule of thumb: if I can decline the cookie/cupcake/whatever without hurting the feelings of the offerer, I will always decline. If not, I will take the cookie/cupcake/whatever, and eat half of it.

Another challenge will be the evening sugar craves, and I don't know how to address those, other than with willpower... Does anyone have any good advice?

I took the kids to the cupcake ATM during my first week of SB. 

Look at the excitement at the promise of Sprinkles cupcakes! 

And I'm smiling too because my resolve is still strong here.. One week later I was not smiling anymore!

Ha! Sugar has nothing on me! 

Ok, maybe I sneaked a bite.. but it was small enough not to count!! 

Melting

While the snow is finally melting, the pounds are melting off too. Four pounds lost in the first week of the South Beach diet. (In the words of James Brown: I feel good!) The second week begins with good motivation to keep going. I have to confess that I did not totally conquer my sugar cravings yet, and gave in a couple times during the first week so there is more work to be done. However, if I could learn something from last week, it is that I can have a small bite of something sweet and it does not have to turn into a binge. 

This photo is from Friday afternoon. Hopefully all the snow is gone by the end of this week! 

Out of Office

I haven't done an outfit post in ages, because this extended winter has just sucked up all my enthusiasm for style. I would just like to dress up in a snuggie all the time. However, I would most likely get fired for showing up at the office in a snuggie... So my uniform has been black pants and a cashmere sweater, occasionally accessorized with an Hermes scarf. But when you travel, you have to actually plan outfits and think about how it all goes together. Do you find it hard to pack for business trips? I used to. But practice makes perfect, and also having a system that works for you. I pack only black, gray and white. Nothing bulky, and nothing that wrinkles. I throw in a colorful accent such as a scarf or a statement necklace. If it's a three day trip, I pack one dress, a blazer, pants, skirt, 2 blouses. These I can mix and match since they are all neutral colors. Of course I throw in some sleepwear and workout wear, which are things that I can wear in public, i.e. not the yoga pants with a hole or the ratty t-shirt I use for my workout at home.

Here's what I was wearing a month ago on my trip to Cali.

Luckily, since I don't have to travel much anymore, I actually enjoy it. Even sitting in a plane for six hours is wonderful. Where else would I be able to just tune out for six hours?

March(ing) Orders

Ok, I am announcing it here so as to keep myself accountable: I'm going on a strict South Beach Phase 1 diet today. The phase 1 lasts for two weeks, and it means no carbs, no sugar, only lean protein and light veggies. I have to break this sugar addiction cycle I have gotten stuck in this winter, and I know the South Beach works because I've done it before. You eat 5 small meals a day, breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, and dinner. You have to stick to the schedule, which can be a challenge for me. And you must stick to portion control, which is also a challenge. The final challenge is not snacking after dinner... It will be a challenging couple of weeks. But from experience I know that the cravings are worst for the first few days, after which they start disappearing, and in the end of the two weeks, the sugar cravings will be gone. My main goal is to rid myself of the sugar craving because I know that will help me feel better and make it easier to first lose and then maintain my weight. I don't have a crazy weightloss goal in mind. In this first phase, I would be happy if I lost 5 pounds. From previous experience I know that it is a very possible and realistic goal. Overall, I would like to lose about 10 pounds. More would be nice, but I'm keeping myself realistic. I'll check in again after these first two weeks, and let you know what happened.

Oh, and ha ha... I see the irony of posting this right after the cake recipe... Well you see why I need to do this!